Walk it off.

I have had this book for years. I have paged through it but not actually used it. It is a 28-day walking and strength training program. Pretty low-intensity plan, but that's perfect for me right now. I love that I just turn to the Day 1 page and it tells me exactly what to do that day.
Every day for the next 28 days!
Super simple--very little thinking. Perfect!
The journal pages have a section to record an abbreviated version of what I eat, then sections about how I feel that day. One section has you finish this sentence: one thing I am proud of today. I like that they throw a little positive self-talk exercise in there!
So that's my plan for the next 28 days! I'll follow the plan from this book and continue to do my Post-Natal Rescue DVD. I'll post on that later!

Hi, Rosie.

Rosie is 3. She weighs about 35 lbs.
I weigh about 185.
That's like me being 150 lbs and carrying her around all day every day.
Now that puts things in perspective.

Size 14.

Remember when size 8 seemed huge? And now it would be a hugely celebrated accomplishment!
I am wearing a size 14 right now.
I am nursing my four month old baby so my shirts are HUGE. I am only 5' 2" and definitely have an "apple" shape.
What's interesting is that I feel so much more comfortable with my body and comfortable with wearing a size 14 than I ever did wearing even a size 10.
It's been tricky dressing this post-baby body but I have embraced it more this time around.
I've been playing around with accessories more and trying new things. I feel mostly confident about dressing myself.
I had a moment last weekend. It seems I can handle the weekdays but then when I have to get ready for church, all of my old insecurities come flying in my face. I start thinking about how nice other women are going to look and how it seems everyone else is wearing a smaller size than I am.
After my little pity party (and after I found a perfectly cute church outfit), I was reminded twice throughout the day about how just because other people fit into smaller sizes or are more physically fit than I am doesn't mean they are any happier. Or that they don't also have struggles. I might be wearing a size 14 right now but I have been gifted a peace about my life that doesn't depend on my clothing size. I've been gifted an amazing husband, three beautiful girls, and more grace than I could ever ask for. I can say that "it is well with my soul".
A phrase I learned last year at the Hearts at Home convention: don't compare your insides to everyone elses' outsides. How unfair of us! This is something I have to practice NOT doing constantly. It gets easier the more I do it. But that is definitely a work in progress.
In the meantime I will stay comfy in my size 14s but keep working toward a smaller size because I know that's the right, healthy thing to do. Because I want to honor God with my body, and in my case staying at a size 14 means I'm not honoring Him in every way that I can.

New (old) plan

We have been working with our five year old on potty training at night. She's done much better than I expected. She is usually dry 5-6 nights out of 7!
One of the changes we've made is limiting what types of beverages she drinks. Originally, that meant choosing milk or juice for breakfast and having only water the rest of the day. It was working well so we got a little lax in enforcing the plan.
She had a few accidents one week so we had to reset our game plan. Now that she's started school, she drinks milk during a break at school and then has a juice box with her after school snack.   We discussed with her that when she is at home (on school days), she will drink only water to satisfy her thirst. She was on board with this plan until her little sister was drinking a Carnation Instant Breakfast shake. It was chocolate. (An important fact.)
And then began the whining.
And the crying.
And the carrying on.
And.....lightbulb...
We have identified Sweetness' issue and have come up with a plan that, when consistent, has resulted in many nights of success for her. She whines and she cries. But we stick to our plan.

Because when we stick to our plan, it works.

I have identified my issue (hello--50 lbs overweight!) and have come up with a plan (eat well & exercise to put it simply).
And I whine ...
And I cry ...
And then I throw my plan out the window.

So--new plan: stick to my plan.
(and maybe try the kicking and screaming whining method of my five year old. And stick to the plan.)

Day 1. (How many times can I use the same title?)

Birdie is 4 months.
Four months.
I finally feel "normal".
Well, normal-ish.
So I'm going to write a weight-loss blog. Which is kind of laughable. Because I am typically not good at losing weight. Or, more accurately, I suck at losing weight.
Until now.
Until now?
Until now.
50 in 40. Nine months up, nine months down, right?! I'm getting a bit of a slow start. Four months slow... Here's the thing. I didn't really struggle with my weight until after I had babies. I mean really struggle. Not the "I'm so fat even though I weight 120 lbs and wear a size 2 jeans" of my college days. And not the "we go out to eat all the time and I eat as much as he does but I put on ten pounds" of my newlywed days. Like most girls, I thought I struggled before but I was just letting insecurities rule my identity.
And now, after carrying and birthing three beautiful little girls, I really struggle with my weight. I am fifty pounds overweight. I am not that same insecure girl who thought she was fat because she didn't look like the girls on the magazine covers. I feel really good about who I am--who God has made me to be. I love my life. I've made it through some challenging days and am really grateful for who I've become. Losing this extra weight is something I've been hoping to do for a long time. I want to be athletic. I want my girls to be healthy and active. I want to feel proud of what I've accomplished.
So now.
It's time.
50 pounds. 40 weeks.

Day 1.

First official weigh-in this morning. 183.0
Seriously need to lay off the bagels and baked goods... It's just that chocolate chip cookies have never tasted so good!
Celebrated one month since baby girls's birth day yesterday. Now that we've made it through the first month, it's time to get serious about getting back (? Can I say "back"?) in shape. :)
You read all the time that people attribute breastfeeding to post-baby weight loss success. I'd like to use all these feedings to my advantage right now. So this, my first week on the wagon, I'm tracking WW points and starting to get some exercise. (will post more about that plan later) And then let all this milk-making and baby-feeding help me out here.

50 in 40. Reboot.

I had the gift of carrying Birdie for 40ish weeks and now I get to start anew with my weight loss journey! I'm around 180ish (I'll post my weigh-in on Saturday). So back to my original goal of 50 lbs. 50in40.
They say: nine months up, nine months down. I only have 15ish lbs to reach my pre-pregnancy weight. I'm praying that I will be more motivated this time around and hit my goal of 50in40 instead of settling for just losing that 15ish lbs of pregnancy weight.
My "due date" for losing those 50 lbs is Saturday, February 9, 2013. First weigh-in is this Saturday! Ready or not!! Here we go!